I am in Croatia. This was not a planned trip. I was supposed to be in Berlin for four months but ran into visa problems. With only a few days notice, my boyfriend and I chose our destination, bought a ticket, packed our things, and flew to Pula, Croatia—a place I knew nothing about.
For us, traveling is more than 50% about the food. And Croatia delivers!
In May 2015, I walked the entire Camino Frances from St. Jean Pied de Port to Finisterre— `528 miles in 29 days. For most people that would be enough.
But when I met a group of guys from Belgium in Finisterre who said they had just walked through the night, I said “I want to do that!”
It is always a bit sad to finish the Camino. There is a peace and grounding about this shared community of people moving together directed by yellow arrows and shells. One more day of walking sounded nice.
My walking buddy agreed to go only if we could attempt to walk 100km.
I am a meditator. Devout. Self taught. It is just in me. I was born with the interest.
For me, meditation is simply a labor of love. Something that I do for myself because it makes me a better person. It helps me understand myself. It helps me be present for myself. It is often sweet and blissful but more often painful and brutal.
I have been meditating for 20 years. I still have a monkey mind. And something similar with my emotions. They won’t stop. I meditate to be able to be present for the thoughts and feelings. Not to make them go away.
Sometimes I wish I could be a traditional mom for my 11-year old to make life easier for him. But one of the things I am learning for myself is that we cannot change who our parents are at their core. I cannot make my Dad want to see me and spend time with me. I cannot tell my mother to keep her opinions to herself—it would simply not feel genuine to her.
I am a nomad. A free spirit. Someone who craves authenticity and honesty as my primary value. And it is only in this state that I can cultivate a substantial relationship with my son.
Wexler and I
In May 2017 Wexler and I went to Haiti. Mom and son on an adventure to redefine our relationship.
There was no real choice for me once it became clear that I was meant to travel. To be a traveling nomad. A citizen of the world. There was no turning back. If I was going to be true to myself then this is what I had to do. And being true to myself, while it might seem selfish to others, is how I feel like I can be the very best friend, partner, educator and mother.
Four years ago I began an outer journey that took me around the world and an inner journey that allowed me to have a much greater understanding of who I am.
When I was young we went to Florida. I remember there was a nudist beach nearby but the way that people spoke about it sounded creepy. And shameful.